Sorry, it’s been a while since I did the first two parts. Time for some more.
Here’s the third round! I’ve colour coded the responses so you can see who said what. Purple- Geek Green- Lawyer Red- Donor

Financial commitments and responsibilities?

  • Who will be financially responsible for the child?
  • Lawyer and Geek will be financially responsible for the child. This will be the case even if they separate.
    D will not be financially responsible for the child, unless he seeks some form of shared care arrangement.

    Geek and Lawyer
    Solely you guys. As we’ve discussed, I look forward to a low paid and potentially stressful career, and I’m simply not anticipating the possibility of being able to financially support any child other than one that I raise.

  • Will the donor be expected to make any financial contribution to the maintenance of the child? How will this be organised? Will it be a regular fixed amount or adhoc arrangement?
  • D will not be expected to make any financial contribution to the maintenance of the child at all. Unless he gets the lawyers involved for custody.
    No financial contribution required at all.
    As above.

  • What financial provisions will be made for the child by all parties with regard to inheritance, superannuation, insurance and wills?
  • Lawyer and Geek will both ensure that mutual wills are drawn up, naming each other the beneficiary of their estate and the child as the beneficiary of the surviving partner. The wills will also include preferred parenting arrangements for the child in the event that both die. The child, as a dependent, will be named as a beneficiary along with the other partner in both Geek and Lawyers’ superannuation and insurance.
    D can make any arrangements regarding inheritance, wills, superannuation and insurance that he sees fit. There will be no obligation that he recognises the child in this way.

    Children will inherit from both Lawyer and I as if Lawyer was the biological parent.
    I can’t commit to any arrangement at this stage, which is not to rule it out.

  • Will the child be included in the donor’s will or in any insurance policies or superannuation?
  • This will be entirely at D’s discretion; there will be no obligation or expectation that he includes the child.
    If you want to.
    As above.

Living arrangements?

  • Where will the child live, which state or which country will all parties live in?
  • The child will live with Lawyer and Geek. The child will initially live in Hometown but this may change dependent on the needs of the family as a whole.
    D may live in Europe for an extended period of time, or may return to Australia or live elsewhere. This will have to be further discussed and negotiated when his circumstances become clearer.

    With Geek and Lawyer, in Hometown
    This is again, solely you guys’ decision, as regards to where the child will live. As with any family, presumably where you guys go, the child will go. All I can say about my own placement, is that while I have a predilection for Melbourne, the city you guys are living in will have a huge impact on the one I choose to live in if and when i return to live in Australia within the coming few years.

  • What happens if the donor wants less contact or wants to move interstate or overseas?
  • If D wants less contact with the child, we would accept this. If he wants to move interstate or overseas, we will not offer any barriers to him doing so as long as he does not attempt to either force us to move with the child so that he can have access, or commit us to, for example, flying the child to Europe on a yearly basis. Geek and Lawyer will act in the best interests of the child and their family circumstances.
    He is! Would like D to keep in contact somehow though. Emails, phone calls, letters, etc.
    This is somewhat moot, as I already AM overseas…. but once again, I’ll draw the parallel to the uncle figure. To elaborate on this; while I hope that we’ll become an extended family, I don’t want my biological role to interfere with the reality of you two being the child’s parents. And I think an effect of this family dynamic is one that goes the other way, to affect my rights and responsibilites; i.e. I will have only the degree of say which you want or need from me in the raising of the child, while simultaneously I will be free to follow my life where it is leading, but under a feeling of being honoured to be in the position of having a personal and familial obligation to seek to develop a permanent, close and loving relationship with your son, daughter, or other, as once again, would a closely involved aunt or uncle.

  • What if the lesbian parents want to move with the child interstate or overseas?
  • This will be dependent on where D lives. If he continues to live in Europe and does not have a permanent relationship with the child, Lawyer and Geek will not consult with him if they want to move interstate or overseas. If he lives in Australia and has some form of contact with the child, they will discuss the child’s best interests with D and negotiate ways to maintain an agreed level of access. D will not bring court action or provide a barrier for Lawyer and Geek if they want to move and it is in the best interests of the family.
    As above
    That’s more than fine, again. If the move ends up being one that takes you away from me, particularly if I have located myself somewhere for the purpose of being closer to your family, I hope I’ll be involved in discussions before that decision is made, but at the end of the day; it will be your family unit, and your decision to make.

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